Rangitīkei woman puts her husband up for auction on Trade Me after his impromptu fishing trip

One wife had enough of her husband after he left her with the kids during the school holiday - and pulled a priceless prank on him.
One wife had enough of her husband after he left her with the kids during the school holiday - and pulled a priceless prank on him. Photo credit: Trade Me via Stuff

A lot of people can probably sympathise with the urge to sell your significant other when they're being particularly aggravating - which is what one Rangitīkei woman attempted to do after her husband left on an impromptu fishing trip.

When John McAlister - a 37-year-old beef farmer - abandoned his wife of two years, Linda, for a spontaneous fishing trip during the school holidays, it was the straw that broke her very tired back. 

"As he is a shooting and fishing sort of fellow it's not unusual behaviour, but with kids on school holidays and [their] bedtimes slipping later and later, they are driving me wild," she told Stuff.

In a bid to offload her unsuspecting spouse, the mum-of-two took to Trade Me and put John up for auction - with free shipping!

Standing at an impressive 6'1, the "farmer/hunter/fisher" has had a number of previous owners, but should remain loyal if fed and watered, Linda joked.

Speaking to Stuff, the Marton-based couple - parents to four-year-old Colt and six-year-old Ryder - made it clear that despite the ups-and-downs of marriage, they are still a good match.

"He was sure he would fetch a pretty penny," Linda said. 

John, who only found out about the listing through his mates, said he's "just [been] laughing at the whole thing".

And the listing also attracted a decent amount of interest, with 12 bids bumping John's price tag to $100. 

But it was not meant to be, with Trade Me taking down the priceless prank on Tuesday.

Although the listing had breached its terms and conditions, Trade Me's policy and compliance manager, James Ryan, admitted to Stuff that the spouse-for-sale was still a "fun" prank.

Before the listing was removed, prospective buyers were keen for more information about their bargain beau - with some even offering a spouse swap.

"Any vices?" one asked.

Linda replied: "Extremely fond of lengthy pasture and or weather conversations; generally of a Friday evening, involving a sturdy focus on hydration. Also suffers from socks-on-the-floor-itus, which I have found to be contagious to younger models and unfortunately reoccurring."

From time to time an interesting listing can make its way onto Trade Me, hidden among the kids' clothes and bulk-buy books. Last year's notable listings included a 'Cardborghini Aventador', a model of the Sky Tower made out of rubbish collected during MIQ, and to take the cake, a half-eaten loaf of Vogel's bread - which sold for $4000.

Another honourable mention - a personalised plate emblazoned with Chris Hipkins' legendary "spread your legs" mantra, adopted by the public as perhaps the catchphrase of the pandemic.